Last Updated:
November 7th, 2024
Is my friend suffering from an alcohol addiction?
When trying to determine whether your friend is suffering from alcohol addiction, it’s important to clarify that not every challenging interaction with alcohol signals addiction. Distinguishing between a ‘rough patch’ and addiction can be tricky, but there are key signs to consider.
A ‘rough patch’
Let’s first define what we mean by a ‘rough patch’. This isn’t an official term, but for the sake of this discussion, we’ll use it to describe when a person uses alcohol in unhealthy ways.
For example, one of the most common ways a person might misuse alcohol is to cope with issues in their life, such as financial struggles, relationship problems, mental health issues or even grief.
There may be other factors as well, such as difficulty finding their limits and unintentionally overindulging, which leads to problematic behaviour.
It’s also possible that their life is relatively stable, but they may be drinking more on weekends to relieve their boredom.
While this isn’t necessarily an alcohol addiction, it’s a pattern that can be risky if left unchecked. Over time, such behaviour could lead to more serious issues, including alcohol addiction.
An alcohol addiction
If you feel your friend’s behaviour extends beyond a ‘rough patch,’ you can observe the following symptoms of alcohol addiction:
- Increased tolerance, meaning they need to drink more to feel the effects.
- Drinking alone or in secret.
- Lying or becoming defensive when asked about their drinking.
- Neglecting responsibilities at work, school or home because of drinking.
- Drinking to relieve stress, anxiety or depression regularly.
- Inability to stop drinking once they start.
- Withdrawal symptoms like shaking, sweating or nausea when not drinking.
If you’ve noticed your friend displaying any of these signs, it could be an indication that they need early intervention, which can prevent further harm.
How can I talk to my friend about their alcohol issues?
If you suspect your friend may be struggling with alcohol addiction, it’s natural to want to address it. While your intentions are good, it’s important to approach the conversation thoughtfully. Below, we offer tips and advice on what to consider before and during the conversation with your friend.
1. Prepare yourself
Before you talk to your friend, it’s important to prepare yourself emotionally. Recognise that this conversation could be difficult and that your friend may not react as you hoped. Try to understand your reasons for bringing up the topic, whether it’s because you’re worried about their health or because you’ve seen their drinking affect other areas of their life.
Do:
✔️Reflect on why you’re concerned.
✔️Remain calm and compassionate.
✔️Be prepared for any reaction, including denial.
Don’t:
❌Approach the conversation when you’re feeling angry or frustrated.
❌Assume your friend will immediately recognise the issue.
2. Choose the right time and place
Timing and environment are key. Approach your friend when they’re sober and when you both have enough time to talk. Choose a private setting where they won’t feel exposed or embarrassed.
Do:
✔️Pick a quiet, private place where you can have an uninterrupted conversation.
✔️Make sure your friend is sober and calm.
Don’t:
❌Confront them at a party or social gathering where alcohol is involved.
❌Bring up the issue when they’re stressed or in a hurry.
3. Express concern, not judgement
When you start the conversation, lead with your concern for their well-being. Use “I” statements instead of “you” statements to avoid sounding accusatory. For example, “I’ve noticed you’ve been drinking more lately and I’m worried about you” is better than “You’ve been drinking too much.”
Do:
✔️Use a caring and non-judgmental tone.
✔️Focus on how their behaviour is affecting their health or life.
Don’t:
❌Blame or criticise them for their drinking.
❌Make assumptions about why they’re drinking.
4. Listen to their side
Give your friend space to speak and explain their perspective. They may not be ready to admit there’s a problem but allowing them to express their feelings can make them more open to change in the future. Show that you’re there to listen, not just to talk.
Do:
✔️Practice active listening by nodding and acknowledging their feelings.
✔️Be patient and let them talk without interrupting.
Don’t:
❌Interrupt or try to force them to admit they have a problem.
❌Dismiss their feelings or downplay what they’re experiencing.
5. Offer support, not solutions
It’s important to offer your support rather than trying to fix the problem for them. Let them know you’re there for them and that you’re willing to help them take the next steps, whether that’s cutting back on their drinking or seeking professional help. You can gently suggest they consider talking to a professional but avoid pushing them into a decision.
Do:
✔️Offer to help them find support, such as going to a doctor or attending a meeting with them.
✔️Reinforce that you’re there for them, no matter what.
Don’t:
❌Force them into a solution or make ultimatums.
❌Dismiss their autonomy or ability to make their own choices.
What if nothing changes after I confront them?
If you’ve confronted your friend and it’s clear they don’t want to change or they’ve tried to change but haven’t made any real progress, it might be time to consider an alcohol intervention.
An alcohol intervention is a carefully planned process where friends, family members and sometimes professionals come together to confront a loved one about their drinking. The aim of an intervention is to help the person recognise the impact their drinking has on their life and the lives of others and to encourage them to seek treatment. It’s not about shaming or blaming but about offering a path forward with love and support.
The main goals of an intervention are to break through denial, create a moment of clarity and provide a clear plan for getting help. This could involve encouraging your friend to enter a rehabilitation programme, seek therapy or join a support group. It’s important that the intervention comes from a place of care and concern, focusing on solutions rather than guilt.
If you’re unsure about how to stage an intervention, Oasis Runcorn can offer advice on what steps to take. While we don’t provide intervention services directly, we can certainly offer resources or guidance to help you approach the situation in the best way possible.
Where can my friend find treatment for alcohol addiction?
If one of the main aims of holding an intervention is to suggest alcohol addiction treatment, you might be left wondering where to turn or what to recommend. This can feel overwhelming but know that help is available. Oasis Runcorn offers a comprehensive alcohol addiction rehab programme that could be just what your friend needs.
Our programme includes alcohol detox to safely manage alcohol withdrawal symptoms, various therapies to address the root causes of alcohol addiction and aftercare to support long-term recovery. The focus is on providing the right care at every stage of the journey, ensuring your friend receives the guidance and tools they need to make lasting changes.
If you’re feeling unsure about what steps to take next, don’t hesitate to get in touch with us at Oasis Runcorn. We’re ready to offer advice, support and treatment options for both you and your friend. You don’t have to go through this alone, reach out and let us help guide you.
